Tag Archives: Date

88 Thoughts You Have While On A Bad First Date

 

BAD DATE

First dates can be intimidating. What if you smile too much? Or talk about the ex too much? Or drink too much? As you flirt your way over aperitifs and appetizers, there could be a lot of questions that are racing through your mind – from the classic ‘does he like me?’ and ‘Who’s going to pay for this one?’ to the more practical ‘Should I go commando?’ and ‘Is that boil over his lip a cold sore?’

Point is, every date is different – from borderline psychotic to RomCom-level charming – and each one is a story by itself. Don’t know how to sort the good ones from the bad? If this were your train of thought while you were out with a potential Prince Charming, I’d say you board the first compartment and flee as far away as you can:

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Number Fifteen: The Therapist

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Art Work: Aakash Dewan.

It’s a sweaty Friday afternoon – but we are indoors, wolfing down second helpings of chicken schezwan noodles, and trying to get the waiter to get our drinks (two large pegs of rum with a little cola, topped all the way with ice) to our table. The air is heavy with cigarette smoke and endless chatter – you can smell the waywardness of our lives. I want to ask him whether he would like to share a smoke – but first, I have something more important up my sleeve –

‘What’s your name?’

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Number Twelve : The It-Boy

Art  Work: Siddha Kannur
Art Work: Siddha Kannur

Twelve. Where do I begin?

Grindr’s geo-location tag says that he stays three blocks away. For gay men, that’s the same as being next door neighbours. ‘Three blocks?’ one might say, ‘Think of that as three hundred and sixty two meters to someone who could possibly be the next love of your life.’ Any closer, and he could practically duck-walk his way home, in thirty minutes or less. There’s a pizza commercial in there somewhere.

His name flashes on my phone – ‘What are you doing now ‘. Is that a question? Does it have an answer?

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